First and foremost, acknowledging there are toxic people in your life is heartbreaking.
I can remember every single time and every single person I realized wasn't good for me. It's like waking up one day and your favorite candy just doesn't taste the same. I know that may be odd but the comfort and safety and reassurance that this one thing (or person) that you could rely on all of a sudden changes.
Change is never easy to accept but making the choice to take ownership of your life, energy, surroundings, & circumstance takes a lot of gumption.
Yesterday, I was leading a workshop focused on goals and how to hold yourself accountable to reach those goals & the question came up "what if your friends or family give you a hard time? What if they don't support you & they make you feel bad about the change you're implementing - what if they just don't get it?”.
And the hard truth is - you have to make that choice. Are you willing to allow some external person or situation or environment run YOUR life or are you going to take ownership and swim upstream?
It's definitely easier said than done. I personally have INTENTIONALLY removed people in my life and it hurt - BAD. I made the decision that I COULD NOT and WOULD NOT allow myself to receive negative energy. I was NOT going to allow myself or my emotions to be toyed with. I needed consistency. I was depressed and anxious and felt like the world was telling me I was unworthy. I needed to surround myself with positivity. This meant I did an audit of my life. I would even tell my own mother "please do not tell me what I should be doing or how I can do better; that's not what I need right now.”
Yes I understood her intentions. Yes I knew she always wanted what was best for me but setting those healthy boundaries really allowed me to be kind and gracious and patient with myself.
Cutting out the need to be around the crowd, or always feeling like I was less than bc I wasn't a part of the 'cool kid' group gave me the opportunity to decide on who I wanted to be, what I wanted to bring to the world, and really make up my mind on what I valued in life.
Whether it be severing ties with a negative person, breaking off an unhealthy relationship, or checking a family member - you are in the control of what you allow yourself to take on. You choose what to expose yourself to and what to spend your energy on.
Be intentional with you who spend your time with. If you're around negative, gossipy, small-minded people, don't be surprised if you're always in a bad mood, can never find the good in people, or simply can't find happiness for yourself.
Rid yourself of toxic people in your life and see what wonders you'll bring to your peace of mind.